Alter Egos ` Part Deux

So...Phoenix Rayne in pants...anybody who grew up with me during this time period pretty much knows about that craziness. Sneaking out, being accused of stealing cars, hanging out with people who stole cars and carried weapons that I can't mention just in case, perfecting hiding weaponry in weaves and so forth, finding inconvenient ways to get the attention she thought she deserved, et cetera.

All that to say, there comes a time when your alter ego has to either disappear or merge into who you are (short of schizo), to help to to grow and understand life in a different way. That it is a defense mechanism, a way to protect you from some unseen emotion or conviction. Being able to say that you as an alter ego did something is almost like a subconscious justification for the action to the dominant personality. Like an actor on stage, the vulnerability factor goes through the roof for both the actor and the character, but at the end of the day, the actor can say 'I didn't do this action b/c the character wouldn't have done it'. With an alter, you can assume the character and assume the world is the stage, but it only works if there are other players - and if you are able to shed that character at the end of the scene.

But my alter ego still lives a little, and if I drink she sometimes has an accent. Every once in a while, I will throw caution to the wind and just live (that's what wigs are for). But, as you get older, you don't have the same safety nets that you do when you are younger. If you slash a tire now, you might actually catch a case if someone sees you do it. If you have that hot passionate sex with a total stranger, you might be assassinated. If you fight at the club, your @$$ might just go to jail. If you fall in love, you may have your heart broken without a repairman nearby to fix it...or a sponsor... ;-p

So the moral of this story, live life without regrets, accept yourself for who are and if you want to change something about yourself, change it in a healthy way, but still be true to yourself and don't drop standards for anything or anyone and you won't need an alter ego...just a few wigs, a nice pair of hater blockers, and a tight mini dress to wear while you get down with the get down!

'Tis All.

Let's talk about Alter Egos

Everyone has one nowadays. Ciara has CiCi, Lil' Jon a la Dave Chapelle, Michael Jackson has Diana Ross...I'm not exempt from this phenom.

In elementary school, I came home from school to find my clothes being thrown in a garbage bag because wearing pants was / is against the Word. Traumatic I know.

So it was around this time that I started sneaking. It started with putting pants I salvaged from the fireless bon-fire in my bag and changing in the bathroom at school. I had these polka-dotted red and white overall shorts that were something fierce!

Sneaking pants led to wearing make up which led to being flirtacios which led to a whole host of fool-ush-ness I won't go into that resulted in me being the take first ask questions later attention-whore. A.K.A. Phoenix Rayne in pants....

Battery is low on the phone. To Be Continued.

'Tis NOT All.

Diva Is For Divine

I am currently re-reading 'Unveiling the Diva Mystique' and I think that every Christian female (and especially Eastern Stars) should pick this book up at least once. It beautifully illustrates guiding principles that shows that we are Divas not because our nails and hair are laid, but because we are justified by our God and how living for Him ultimately makes us into the awesome women we are! Yep, I'm a Diva.... and not b/c BeyBounce' made the song.

In a non-diva-like manner, I saw a man today that made me trip while getting ready to walk in traffic. What do you say to something like that? What do you do besides shrug your shoulders and remind yourself that 20% of men in DC carry that Silent Assassin - that Ninja - that Sniper.

In other news I met a Latino named Joe. That was a new experience for me. He asked me for my number...then he asked me where I lived. That is a big no-no.

But back to the topic at hand, 'Diva Mystique' also gives you questions for reflection at the end of each lesson to make your life more diva-licious by the Word. Like a cool glass of wine on a lonely winter night wrapped in a blanket next to a warm fire...or a cold kool-aid next to a space heater.

Just go read the book...this could go on all night

'Tis All.

Iraqi Kiss

Really? They say that this is the most disrespectful way to show disapproval... But, you have to give props where props is due...Bush dodged those shoes like Black men avoid the cops, like Kobe avoids white women, Soldja Boy avoids good lyrics, and Lil' Wayne avoids enunciation.

'Tis All.

Are you surprised?

Illinois Governor selling Senate seat:

http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2008/12/09/AR2008120900987.html?hpid=topnews

Are we really surprised that the Man is trying to take further advantage of the political system? Next thing you know they are going to say to the Supreme Court, 'Well Obama may be a U.S. citizen, but he is connected to corrupt politicians.' No sh!t Sherlock.

In other news, I hate fake people and we should rid the world of them. Sometimes I wondered why militant black men marry white women (not that I am against healthy, inter-racial relationships, especially when the man in question is Seal).Imagine Larry Fishburne as Dap (School Daze) with Buffy the Vampire slayer. Does that surprise you anymore? It doesn't surprise me.

Alan Keyes and Clarence Thomas - do they surprise you?

I am the only Black female in my company. Does it surprise you that I am also the angry-Black-female just because there is no one else to put the label on? Does that give me a little leverage because no one know how I will react in any given situation? Would it surprise you if I decided that I needed to explore my Indian roots and SlapaHoe tribe? Would that make me guilty of being a stereotype, and if so would you be surprised that it did? I wouldn't. This chick up in here done went and lost her ever-loving mind. If I mysteriously disappear or stop working, you all will know why.

'Tis All.

What is the problem?

Don't you feel like asking people this sometimes when they are getting on your nerves?

You just want to look at them and say what is the problem, or what is your problem, or WTF is wrong with you, or whatever variation you prefer. I can't even go into details b/c it might put me in a compromising position.

But this is relevant in everyday life as well. DON'T send me a text and you are not my man (or a man that I am interested in) and say "what's up Sexy", "hey baby" or some other inappropriate non-relationship greeting. Even the Metro workers, don't call me a "shawty" or the like, I don't know you, man, WTF is your problem; then get mad when I don't say anything. Pff-shh. Unless you are that tall guy who wears his locs pulled back with the shape up in the front, the full lips, brown eyes, glasses, and the neatly trimmed mustache that gets off at my stop.

This is just a short random rant, and for this very reason, I want to start my own business. Pray for me saints that I don't end up making someone jump off of a cliff or slit their wrists to avoid having to ask this question.

'Tis All.

P.S.: You can always judge people by how they respond in times of crisis, and let me say officially that I love my family and friends very much so and this message does not apply to you.

Celebreality

Pon de Replay on these photos:


www.xarj.net circa 05.


Essence.com circa 08.

Now. Personally, I like a cheeseburger or two. Matter of fact, I had a cheeseburger last night. This girl got a little thick up ain't she? But, it very well could be that she is pregnant by Chris Brown. I hope not.

In other news, Essence.com just sent out the 5 best-dressed celebrity couples. I wonder if they choose these people based on whose popular at the time versus who really looks good. Personally this photo:

Essence.com

is a no-go for me. I sure there were several other couples that could have been chosen as runner-up. And while I'm hating on Beyonce, lest I forget later, this Etta James foolishness ...*sigh*.

Here is a picture of Etta James:


Here are pictures of Jill Scott and Queen Latifah:
www.blackvoices.com. (Excuse the Idris Elba).

Do you see why this is an outrage?

And, I am kinda sad to say that I kinda want to see the Notorious, even though I clearly think Tupac is the better option. In the cast list there is even a "Howard University Party girl" (www.imdb.com). That in itself is going to make me say Hmmm, as long as it's not another Tip Drill.

Today, I started my morning off with this:



Thought you might enjoy it (especially if you're a Prince fan - which by the way thanks for pulling some of your hard-to-find videos off of Youtube now your fans have to go through other sources to stroll down memory lane. OW~)

'Tis All.

I'm moving!

So yep, it's true. I'm moving on up, to the ridiculously overpriced apts on the other side of town. Soo....I'm taking donations and house warming gifts (literally house warming, b/c it's getting colder than a mug up here and gas heat is too expensive). Any decorating suggestions?

*Singing Pretty Pink Baby Blue *

In other news, they finally found some other planets. And the newscaster had the nerve to ask, are we alone in the Universe? We Americans are so selfish. We can't just be a dominant super power on Earth, we gotta take the Universe too? They wildin'!

I'm going to be in NY for New Years (if I make it that long) any road-trippers/ bus-riders out there? Bringing in the official Grown and Sexy with a bang!

Holla at your girl!

'Tis All.

Why Must it Be This Way?

Ok, so every time a white person walks by me today, I try my darnedest to hide the widest grin in all creation. Not b/c I am laughing, just that today, especially today, I feel so proud! Regardless of everything that we all have been through, Obama's election gives us the hope that we can do it in spite of. That America is not completely screwed.

So fast forward.

This brings me to the obvious problem. Race is still very much so a factor in everything we do. Now that Obama is in, all of a sudden, the Morning News stations have panels of fifty-million Black people talking about this historic event. Black people we have never heard of. And white folks that we have also never heard of, speaking on the plight of African Americans and how this election will effect our culture in the future. Why did it take the President being a black man for them to acknowledge the fact that there is a problem, to the nth degree, which they are doing now? I'm sure if McCain had won, these panels would become the flip side of the palm and the matter would gradually fade away after the rioting and looting in the streets have quieted.

Yes, this is the beginning of change. But we as a people have to keep the snowball rolling. I saw so many people ON TIME for work this morning, that it was astonishing! Running to the Subway and actually looking for the newspapers at the station. We have to keep this up, we can't just let the fire die after the hype is over, reignite it on Jan 20, then let it falter again. We have to keep striving. We have to keep rising.

I LOVE BLACK PEOPLE!

'Tis All.

P.S. Still working on the book!

Blogging from the Cell

So, I decided to try something a little different and type a blog from my phone. As a result, this will be short and sweet b/c your girl is tired.

I have a problem. It's true. Since my birthday, I have been counting down until Thanksgiving. So obviously, I have a food problem. I have been thinking about the spread of food that will be there and how in the world will I be able to keep the food I bring back fresh in the car for 8 hours. Any suggestions?

Also, life in the big city...it's been pretty eventful. But why, why are little kids so bad? This little boy was really trying to break bad with this dude on the subway, and got molly-whopped. It was soooo funny yet so sad at the same time. I don't know if its wrong, but this dude had this little boy so shook, and all the black folks we just laughing. I don't know what the deal was, but that little boy needed Jesus and a good switch. OMG, please, my generation, at least try to raise your kids right so the streets won't be able to.

'Tis All.

After Conventions Reflections- Welcome Back Readers

While not having a life actively devoting myself to the political fray during this historical time, I have come to a few conclusions:

1) Bill O'Reilly and Sean Hannity are full of sh!t. The Fools (Fox) News network has the Republican party's stick far up their a$$es and the Administration's hands in their pockets while they pose as an objective source for information regarding American politics both domestically and internationally. And yes, Faux News receives their talking points from the Administration, not talking points which they feel the American public have the right to know about. My problem is not that these guys have an opinion. The problem is that they assert their opinion onto the viewers (by the way, I do not contribute to the growing problem by increasing their ratings, which would imply that I support their biased, obtuse, and relatively child-like behavior which they call interviewing - I watch the show from other sources. Have to watch it in order to critique, right?) in a manner which assumes all of their viewers hold the same opinion and guests on the show are nothing more than pawns to prove that the "White Christian Male" power structure does not lose its base in America (yes O'Reilly did say this). They promote the Conservative agenda and nothing else, regardless of whether or not their candidate may not be right in a particular given situation. When faced with Liberal opposition, their interviews frequently turn into a shouting match in which the hosts play a "you're wrong, I'm right" stance, appear to allow the opposing view the "final word", which is then followed by a statement whose intention is to sway the viewers in favor of the host instead of allowing viewers to make their own conclusions.

Summary: Fox News is full of it.

2) McCain can't play with fire. The GOP backs out of an interview with CNN. His representatives felt as if Campbell Brown crossed the line by inquiring into decisions which the poorly vetted and hastily chosen Veep Gov. Sarah Palin made while serving Alaska which qualify her to be the "fall back" for a Presidential Candidate who was alive when George Washington crossed the Delaware. The speaker skirted around answering said question at least three times, not because he didn't want to answer, but because IMO, he honestly DIDN'T KNOW. Even Obama sat down with Bill O'Really (yes, oh really), a man who mentioned Michelle Obama and lynching in the same sentence, to be "interviewed", which aired immediately preceding the RNC and will be airing Mon-Wed of next week. First of all, O'Reilly stole the RNC's spotlight by attempting to discredit Obama to make him seem incompetent and provide leverage to the GOP's candidate, which failed, and McCain can cancel an interview entirely because a journalist asked too many questions - or just one question that had to be asked numerous amounts of times? Let's not mention how he became the proponent of change. Everyone wants change...but you can't clearly have your opponent's platform. Originality. If he attended CU, he would be brought under questioning by the Committee. Did I mention that I was bored out of my mind listening to him speak, and didn't even flinch until he started recall his POW days because a man who went through all of that and hates war is willing to continue a war for 100 years if need be while following terrorists to the gates of hell? Good ol' John McCan't.

3) The media needs to leave Sarah Palin's daughter alone, period. Sex happens. Pregnancies happen. Her daughter did not sign up for constant bashing of her character. It's a lot for a pregnant, engaged, 17 yr old middle child to be whirl-winded into the national spotlight so suddenly. Please stop bashing her and commend her for making an adult decision by deciding not to have an abortion and step forth into motherhood. And I know I would be pissed if someone exposed my family on national TV like that. To hell with the unwed pregnant daughter sh!t, this is 2008. This has been going on for years. Ever read the Scarlet Letter? Or the Bible?

4)The choice of Sarah Palin, IMO, is just a ploy to win over discouraged Hillary Clinton supporters and add someone to the campaign who can counter what Obama represents as a face of change. However, it's offensive to me as a woman that a politician would think so little of me to assume that I would vote for her just because she is a woman. I can't relate to her. I'm not a mother, I'm not a hockey mom, and she definitely doesn't win any points by saying "Hey, I have a special needs child." My opinion: she will drop from the race because of some unforseen apocalyptic event, say a meteor hitting Alaska, which would allow the GOP to replace her without looking "wishy-washy" and retaining the votes they garnered as a result of her being on the ticket. And yes, I am mad at the Hillary/Democratic voters who switched tickets only because Palin is a woman. WTF y'all? WTF.

While I clearly support a certain candidate, I am not trying to persuade you either way. Research and find out what you stand for. If you don't like either of the candidates from the two major parties, check out these guys: Don Grundman, Diane Templin, Sreve Kubby, or my personal third party favorite, former Black Panther of the Green Party Elaine Brown. The important thing is that you vote.

I know this dissertation is a lot to read. If you are reading this sentence Kudos to you, but no cookie.

'Tis All.

Police

I swear, I have had entirely too many interactions with the Police, whether I am being followed or being written tickets of no fault of my own. I would elaborate, but the way the internet works, a potential employee is probably lurking around the corner waiting for me to incriminate myself.

Now I am really disappointed in the court system in the Sean Bell ruling. I won't go into too much detail considering everyone must know about it by now, but I am sure that everyone knows that it is now officially okay to be gunned down by police officers for no apparent reason, and to rest assured that the officers who committed the act will go home to their families, then one of their acquaintances will (allegedly) make a prank phone call to the grieving family. Oh yeah, and not to mention that it is perfectly OK to rely on African American leaders to "shut the cities down" after an atrocity has been committed rather than to fight the fight before something like this has to happen (are you Sharp on that).

One day, the system will change. I just hope that it is for the better.

'Tis All.

Announcement from the Judgment Seat

OMG, it has been almost two weeks since I last wrote on this blog! I am so not proud of myself, but I did finish one of my three 15 page papers last night. Woot!

This is my announcement:

Cohesiveness is a must in today's society. It would be lovely to understand the things people are trying to communicate (And if you have made it this far, I think that I am doing a good job).

Exhibit A: Drive through speakers are not what's good in the streets. If I have to ask you to repeat my order for me more than three times while cutting the radio off, leaning out of the driver's side window and asking for confirmation from my fellow riders to make sure that I was not losing my hearing, then there is a problem. By the time I get my food, I'm not hungry anymore. I am filled from the frustration of trying to decipher what you have just said. I ordered side salad with Italian dressing, not a Caesar salad with ranch. I have a fish sandwich* with cheese. Not
chili cheese fries. Thank you kindly.

It is more important for me to understand, because if I am over charged, then boo- boo the fool is you. Don't charge me twice for the same thing and say, well most people get more than one. First of all I am not most people, and second of all, don't try to argue me down about what I ordered. I know what I received on that plate... Waffle House, I swear! I don't know why I keep going back to the cesspool.

But, forgetting the tangent. I just want to emphasize that the world will understand many things so much more if we just make ourselves clear:

>I don't love YOU, I love things ABOUT you.

>You turn me on when you do THAT, you don't just turn me on.

>We would like to hire you, but your resume is sh!tty

>I'll call you right back, versus I will call you tomorrow

>That hairstyle would look nice... on someone else

You know. Just be clear.

'Tis All.

*Of course this fish sandwich is "low fat".... right...

Stomach Pangs

A couple of things that make my stomach turn:

1) Today, I found out that not only is South Carolina one of the top 10 most dangerous states, it is also top ten in the most unhealthy in the USA. So on top of paying me next to nothing to work here, getting all of the latest trends in fashion and music extremely late, we also have to deal with the fact that after we save up all of our money, we will probably get robbed. For instance, in a neighborhood not far from my home town (maybe in my hometown, who knows), a woman was shot in her leg by random gunfire from outside - in her house. Not to mention a man was stabbed by a tenant while breaking into his house in the same area. And unhealthy includes STD cases as well. Crazy.

2) After doing so well in my eating habits, I had a Rice Crispy treat with my sub today. That was a bad idea, my stomach is doing jumping jacks at 6:30pm and I don't get out of this class until like 9pm. OMG.

3) Fox news and friends decided that it would be a good idea to put Obama on blast for a statement he made in response to one of his pastor's sermons. This prompted some to leave set, an interview to go sour, and a statement that "As a white person, I am offended that Obama would say something like that." Well as a black person, you make my stomach turn. It offends me Fox News (and Friends) that you all have conservative, supremest ideals that attempt to show the Black community as a nuisance to society and frequently interrupt and prevent statement that may say anything otherwise.

4) What makes my stomach turn. Shady female(s). Yes. Shady female(s). And the men who entertain them. Oh and shady females who try to curse somebody out because they lost their phone when clearly it was attempted to be returned. I hope you drive by that "place" and get it before someone else not so nice finds it and throws it in the woods.

5) Because 5 is such a round number. The last thing that makes my stomach turn is knowing that senioritis has snuck up on me, and I don't have a choice but to do that which I must.

'Tis All.

It's Crunch Time

The real world is right around the corner. So what does that mean for a Libra? That it's time to think of ways to use my career as excuse to travel and have fun so I won't wreck myself in the end.

Papers and classes are getting more demanding as the day progresses, not to mention that stress levels are skyrocketing in between workouts. And my body is accustomed to getting up at 8 30 am for no apparent reason other than just to sit around, considering my classes and job schedules don't start until late. Heck, I'm not even enjoying Spring Break as a Break because I am working on everything but relaxing.

So, this is just short sweet and to the point. Nothing major to think about other than the fact that the realization of adulthood is like a car crash into a brick wall.

'Tis All.

P.S. God is still working in my life!

Adventures in Slutdom- I mean Mushroom Kingdom

Once upon a time there was a slut princess by the name of Peach...Ok ok just kidding.

The true adventure in Slutdom begins with a question: WTF do people think its cute to poke hard penises in your back when you are walking by the in club? I mean if you are really that hard from dancing I'mma need for you to do so much better with your self control or put some better drawers on. Seriously.

Never is it cute to walk around a public place pointing at everybody. Even if you have to go to the bathroom and work that thing out, do that, for the sake of mankind.

I don't need a walking advertisement of your penile erection. "Hey girl, my dick is big" what the fuck fudge ever. I don't want it. If it is big, keep that to your self. Surprise somebody. Contrary to that TLC song, Ain't nobody gonna beg if it ain't a third leg. Find that girl who gonna talk noise about how you ain't worth nothing then whip that out on her when you take that hoe (yeah I said it) home to blow her back out. And wait for her to Clap you up.

Speaking of slutdom, I love me some Prince. I mean, he met a girl named Nikki who was a sex fiend sitting in a hotel lobby masturbating to magazines...and he couldn't resist when Nikki started to grind. Well go ahead Nikki. Woot. Let's not even mention Erotic City. Prince songs just make you wanna commit adultery and fornication, don't they? I would post the videos from Youtube, but they have been removed due to the lawsuit. Oh Prince, wherefore art thy videos?

'Tis All.

Workout Recommendation

For the total of $1, (yes o-n-e dollar) I purchased the Susane Cox Aerobic Dance Workout from Wal-Mart. And because I am not getting paid to endorse this, I'll just say it works. Really.

But seriously folks, let me know what rocks your socks when it's time to rock out. Cause I seem this real big dude running today and I was like whoa, if he can do it, I can do it too. He had the Ipod and was all wet from the rain (or sweat- whichever you prefer) and it motivated me. But see he doesn't have breasts, big breasts, that may hit him in the eye while exercising so...I'll think I'll stick to what I know, thank you very much.

In other news, there was a lightening to Earth warning, I was picked up by parking enforcement, the Chicken Philly from Pot Belly Deli is not the business, being a Bust It Baby is quite disgusting and I am mad at the hoes that are participating, and for once, I just don't have an appetite.

Being Wanted

"The grass is always greener..."

[It has been over a week, so I think that it's time to bless the masses with another blog entry.]

So during a conversation, it was determined that you are more attracted to your mate when others are attracted to him/her. And it is funny, well to me anyway. I mean, that dude that you didn't want gets so fine all of a sudden and you're like "dang, he wanted to be with me and treat me right at one point and time. Now I'm SOL." Yep, you're right. S.O.L. And when your man is fine, that's an ego boost. You want to go EVERYWHERE and make sure these hating heifers know that he's all yours. And men, it's the same. Don't act like you don't get that big head when your girl turn heads.

But the real issue is why hating @$$ females (excuse me) be looking for an opportunity to homewreck? I mean I LOVE me some Will Smith, Okay? But that doesn't mean AT ALL that I am sitting around my house (or on my computer), thinking of ways and opportunities to get at him. Clearly he is happy with me Jada, and I am all for a happy, lasting, Black couple. Clearly though, if Will wasn't with me Jada and Jesus wasn't my savior, I'd be hiring assassins, CIA, and paying Castro to get at him. Seriously.

Men: "Let's hang out and be friends" is an excuse. That chick is plotting on you, and you will find yourself in a sticky situation. Y'all will accidentally drink a lil something, eat a little something, then wake up the next day like dang - wtf did I just do?

Females: "I'm just trying to get to know you a lil' better. I know you got a man and all, but ain't nothing wrong with having friends." Negra please. We all know what that is about. Because he wouldn't approach you like that if he really wanted to be just friends with you in the first place. Obviously.


But yeah, there is nothing wrong with attractions, they are natural. It's respecting the boundaries that are in place when said situation occurs. C'mon people.

But these females. Help me Jesus. They. don't. know. how. to. act. Lord have mercy. My final word on the matter - too little, too late. Don't even think about it.

I can't help that I'm hot.

'Tis All.

Random Thoughts for Friday

Random Thought 1) My time management skills were at one point and time, shot to hell. I had no time for the slow down because the grind was entirely too thrilling. My PDA has become my best friend, reminding me what I have to do. Yeah it's lazy becacuse I never have to remember anything, but how is that different from Facebook?

Random Thought 2) Losing weight is hell. Especially when your breasts don't go anywhere. So all this other stuff is slimming down, and yet, they breasts are directing traffic because now that everything else is smaller, they appear bigger. But they sit up nice in racer-back tops.

Random Thought 3) It sucks living by yourself - or living with a roommate and still feel like you're living by yourself. Sigh. Enough about that.

Random Thought 4) Chinese food is like crack. When I decide to eat Chinese food, I see mainly us folks and Hispanics waiting in line. And when the workers take their breaks, all they have is rice. Seems kinda sketch to me.

Random Thought 5) Life will be fantabulous once Spring Break rolls around. Hopefully it will be hot consistently so I can shed off some clothing. Warm weather is always nice, especially to voyeurs. Not mention, school will be out. I think that in itself is a reason to celebrate.

Random Thought 6) Migraines are the sh!tz, and even worse when you have work to do and you want to do it, but the headache is forcing you to procrastinate.

Random Thought 7) Because seven is such a nice number, if you haven't watched the debate between Obama and Clinton, slap yourself silly, then go to cnn.com and find the highlights.

'Tis All.

Climax

Not the good kind, but the book kind.

A climax is, in sum, where the protagonist has no other choice but do that which all of the action has led up to and leads to the falling action. Before the conclusion.But most importantly, it leads to the falling action.

Now what makes Hollywood think that they can create movies that have absolutely nothing of substance after the climax. Ok, so you sit through the entire movie and you get attached to these characters (if it is a good movie) then the climax occurs and then the credits roll. WTF?

Is it too much to ask that maybe, just maybe, we can have a wrap up at the end. What happened to tying up the knots at the end? I mean, really. I would like to see the protagonist recuperate after a long hard battle of wits/strength/"idiocracy" you know, usual. And don't leave the ending open for a part two when you know good and well there will be no part two. It just confuses the heck out of us because we leave the theatre with questions KNOWING got doggone well that those questions won't be answered until the DVD release interviews, which we won't buy ever because the movie ended in the crappiest way possible. EVER.

In case you're wondering what movie struck this rant, it's Untraceable. Now it did not leave anything open for a part two, but I declare to you this day that you will be just as disappointed as I was - and most movie goers on Rotten Tomatoes. Cheers.

'Tis All.

How I am Feeling Today - Message to my Enemies

Today I feel fabulous and undefeated! On top of the world, without borders or restrictions, reflecting on all the blessings and good things that have been brought into my life as well as those things that are coming into my life.Despite what my life my seem to look like from the outside, I'm still getting mine. And I definitely won't let the haters take away that which is rightfully mine.

Did I mention, that haters are motivators?

They hate when I have, when I don't have, when I'm happy, when I'm not, when I got, and when I don't got.

They hate cause they don't like me and because they do.

They get mad 'cause I take pictures of myself, then wonder why I am not taking pictures of myself.

They hate it when I think I look fly and even moreso when I think I look fly on a bad day.

They hate when I succeed, they think my obstacles are my hindrances and failures.

They think that if I'm down that I'm done.

They read my blog so they can tell people what they think about me and what I think rather than tell me.

Haters exist to peep through the keyhole to get a glimpse of the good life and wait until they think (through their small viewpoints) that things are going bad for me so they can feel better about themselves. Sorry.

So keep on hating, I'll keep on being fabulous, and don't forget everyone, love a hater today.

'Tis All.

Valentine's Day: The Ex Factor

Note to ex-girlfriends/boyfriends across the world:

Valentine's day is not the time to check up on your exes. They are still your exes, they don't want you back, especially on Valentine's Day. Deep down inside, you know that you want them to be thinking about you on that day, whether positive or negative, because they are feeding energy into you. That's a sign people. You're looking for the attention that you don't have. Grow up. Pamper yourself.

I admit I was previously guilty of checking up on the past in the future (not necessarily an ex, but I digress) but I grew up when I realized why. The time, effort, and energy that it takes to remind someone that you exist just isn't worth it in the long run. You could take that same time, energy, and effort and focus it on other tasks - like meditating, cleaning, cooking, exercising. Heck females for 15 bucks you can have your own "me time" and for guys, it may be even cheaper, but that's a different issue.

Either way, for the people that were down, my advice is to wait. Don't backtrack, keep moving forward, it's okay. There is so much more in store than a measly box of chocolates or flowers that are going to die next week and balloons that will deflate and take up space.

And for the hoes - lock yourselves in your room, without internet access. Don't infect the populace with that bull you be on trying to make sure your ex sees that you are happy. If you just BE happy you don't have to worry about whether or not other people view you as happy. It's the inner self that is reflected on the outside. So, get your minds right.

'Tis All.

Midterms

Have got to be the most stressful time of the semester EVER. At least with finals you get a couple of days to cool out, procrastinate and catch up on missed episodes of Nip Tuck and ANTM marathons. But midterms are the bane of most peoples existence...period.

One thing has got me puzzled. Why does it seem that midterms for every class are at the exact same time? I know, you're thinking the name MID term, BUT not all midterms are in the middle of the semester. Some teachers even mask "midterm" with words like "extensive quiz" or a "final preparation." This doesn't change what it is! Euphemisms are for the 50s.

However some professors will let you know that you have a midterm and assure you that it will be the hardest piece of crap you will ever see in life, including your divorce papers. There will always be some random fact that was located in the grey box on that page with the big picture underneath the heading "You don't have to read this" when clearly, you professor thinks otherwise. It's so unfortunate how many desperate, caffeine addicted, sleep deprived co-eds are effected by the midterm torture device - which is exactly why I am writing. I want to save you from unnecessary stress at midterms!

Here's the secret:

1. Sleep more than a little bit - when you have finally reached page three of your notes. Rest. And for every 5 page increment afterwards. Don't be fooled by the all-nighters in the library. I'm sure you'll make the same grades.

2. Rock out - change your notes into freestyles to Ice Ice Baby by Vanilla Ice. If you don't remember your notes then, then I just don't know what to tell you.

3. Eat - more and more and more until you can't eat anymore. It doesn't really do much to be a lazy glutton, but I'm sure you'll feel better afterwards.

4. Drink - alcohol is a depressant. But when you make up your new and improved lyrics for Ice Ice Baby, you'll be sure to remember them.

5. Study groups - are the quickest way to midterm hell. You never get much accomplished, and usually you whine, moan, and complain about the directives of the class anyway.

6. Party - party breaks help you appreciate study time a lot more, especially when you realize that if you don't do it, you will get kicked out of school, fail at life, your parents will hate you, your pets will hate you, and your children will rebel in the future on general principle and will be a constant reminder as to what happened that night you failed out of college and decided to go drinking at the bar.

7. Lastly, because seven is a nice round number - academic dishonestly is against university policy. I won't encourage it, nor will I even mention the dastardly deed in my precious list of the quickest ways to pass a midterm. How dare you even imply that I agree with such a thing? Gosh.

'Tis All.

Thoughts on Super Tuesday

OMG! I have never been so glued to a screen. I felt like I was reading Harry Potter 7 for the umpteenth time. Yes, I was quite impressed by the coverage and even more impressed with my cell phone that streamed the live feed faster than my television did. - and I was able to get my fitness on while watching it.

OBAMA: OMG. When he told that girl he loved her back, I about died laughing - the media tries to portray him as a not-so-black-man who attempts to portray himself as a "brother." As soon as he said that I was like this black man here. Wifey probably sitting in the corner laughing like "She ain't got nothing on me" And he's currently (as of this post) in the lead as far as delegate count.* True. But seriously, go Obama.

Hilary: Yep, she did wonderfully as well. She must have really reached out to the Latino voters for her to pull so many! And she really appealed to emotions during her speech, as only a woman could :0). I was actually looking at her necklace and pearl combination and found myself wondering what shoes she was wearing...But seriously, Clinton is really blowing my mind as far as her popularity among the voters/delegates.

Romney: He pretty much put down the current administration for about half of his speech. I forgot what party he was aligned with (until he mentioned the private sector). But seriously, yeah he pretty much owned Bush for everything that he hasn't done while he was in office.

**

Huckabee: Should just drop out.

McCain: Well, here's the competition... oh well. Pass me the soda, hot wings, and Doritos - I mean the unsalted, unbuttered popcorn, baked chicken, and bottled water.




'Tis All.

*http://news.bostonherald.com/news/national/politics/2008/view.bg?articleid=1071704
**tshirthell.com

Talk for Tuesday: I'm so hood!

The ghetto girl in me yearned to be free yesterday when someone tried to bring me out in public for no apparent reason other for humiliation and bastardliness.

Now, if I am addressed about issues in a civilized manner, I will respond accordingly. But when you try to put me, a 'round the way, lose-all-common-sense-when-I'm-pissed female in a small enclosure with a large number of people and you trying to break bad and shine the dim light that you possess on me, things are going to get a tad bit disturbing.

The culprit in question must have thought that I am on the lighter side of the color scale when he tried to blast me in front of about 20 of my peers. Not to mention, that he tried to downplay my intelligence. And then he gets mad when I have the audacity to say something back, quick-like, defending myself, and playing him all in the same statement. Furthermore, I don't give a flying f^ck. And that in itself is out of character for me.

The ghetto girl in me is either developing a thick skin, or that b!tch is hiding out until something dumb happens that warrants a good smackdown. I'm too close to graduation - Help me Jesus- to let some fool keep me down. And I the book of James gotta calm my nerves quick like before I enter that realm again.

Speaking of which, I am getting sick and tired of some members of the other persuasion cutting their eyes at me like I don't know I'm black attending a PWI. Are you intimidated by me, my race, my swagger (oh I'm sorry, you're not familiar with the term)? Why do you grab your bag when I walk by? Why do you walk in the street to go around me. Bia-tch please. Get hit by the bus. This is why you will go off into the real world, try for a job, and not get said job because someone of my persuasion who attended a PWI has come in and took your place. And how will you feel when Obama is president?

Ignorance is not bliss, but it will cause you to get your wig split.

In other news:

I am attempting to wait until 10p.m. to turn on CNN to see the results of Super Tuesday. That way i can see all the results at once. I am anticipating something really close and I can't wait to go to class (yes I said it) to hear my professor's thoughts on the results.

Maybe one day I will run for a political office, wouldn't that be interesting... wonder how much of my life they will dig up for the dirt so I can publish a book and make some cash? If the Video Vixen can do it...

'Tis All.

Super Tuesday

Consider I study politics, I guess I should address this issue:

It's official (disregard the time stamp at the bottom of this post)!

Well, the results of tomorrow (today rather) will give us so much insight into the minds of Americans - considering people actually go and vote. We are living *in* History! We are witnesses to one of the most telltale elections in... forever!

Let's examine the facts:

We have an African American and A woman both viable contenders for the position for president. We have seen a double number in voter turnout, candidates dropping like flies, and not to mention gunslinging (always entertaining).

Issues are actually being addressed and the current lame duck is trying to remind people that he is still in the White House, if only for a little while longer, by implementing an economic boost, which could have been done earlier in his term. Maybe he is trying to divert attention from the Democratic hopefuls to the Republican party? Hmm?

Well, whatever. I still didn't forget that we went to Iraq on mostly speculation, without the international community supporting us, and not mention taxes increased and the country is still in economic shambles. But hey, gotta try to pick up the GOP's cracked face somehow, huh?

The anticipation surmounts.

My eyes twinkle with the possibility that this country is about to undergo a MAJOR change.

My lips quiver with excitement when I think about 2009 rolling around and a new era unfolds.

I feel better access to health care reigning down on me as I type.

These are my opinions people, nothing more.

'Tis All.

"I Be Working on my Fitness"

Alright, here's an update on the status of my exercise routine that I spoke about in my "Ode to Cellulite":

My cellulite, poor me, is slowly disappearing. It would seem that although I am not losing "weight," certain body parts are appearing to be getting tighter and flatter, which means I am losing fat and gaining muscle (go me, go me). My face is slimming slightly and I am able to exercise more without getting tired so fast (increased stamina).

As far as food is concerned - I love it. It's gonna be a real cold day before I find myself on a real diet. But, I must admit, I have replaced high fat snacks with healthier ones like yogurt. As far as meat is concerned, right now, my choice of meat is fish and all things seafood. I eat whole grains, fruit, and fresh/frozen vegetables. And last but not least, I drink plenty of water and herbal tea (sweetened with honey, not sugar). HOWEVER, I must emphasize that I am not on a diet, so sometimes I have my triple C cravings: coffee, cheeseburgers, and candy. And there you have it.

All this to say, although I don't have too many complaints about my size other than not being able to find a pair of jeans that fit properly; exercise is a must because diabetes doesn't discriminate. Heart disease is a leading cause of death, especially in Black women. I'm not trying to get on that boat, for real.

I'm rockin' out on the stationary bike, ya dig?

'Tis All.

Deadbeat Dads

I can't stand them.

I would wish that they would fall of the face of the Earth, but I can't, that would be wrong.

To sit back and look at these men not take of their children, whether they are living in the home or not, makes me cringe as if I am on the edge of vomiting. They refuse to take responsibility for their actions and are so selfish that they would risk the welfare of their family before attempting to be a man.

And the problem with the court system is that it cannot enforce these men to accept their responsibilities nor can it force them to be a man. Money is not what makes a person a parent.

Maybe things will change one day, but until then, deadbeat dads should be castrated.

'Tis All
*Short sweet and to the point

It's snowing, Facebook is Down, and My two cousins got shot.

1) Ok it's snowing -what joy. Not the norm in the South.

2) Facebook is unavailable from campus. Which due to a lot of strange things, may just be a good thing. One is that people will actually be focused, rather than facebooking and wasting quality time...

AND LASTLY, BUT CERTAINLY NOT LEAST:

3) Two of my relatives were shot and one killed at the club. What kind of nonsense is this world coming to? I can't even go out and enjoy myself without wearing bullet proof vest. Not to mention the ignorant act that happened at the party which shall remain unmentioned.

BLACK PEOPLE. ALL PEOPLE. IT'S TIME TO STOP HATING EACH OTHER. LIFE IS TOO PRECIOUS. IT WASN'T YOURS TO GIVE SO YOU HAVE NO RIGHT TO TAKE IT AWAY. WHY MUST WE ALWAYS RESORT TO VIOLENCE. WHAT DOES IT PROVE THAT YOU CAN SHOOT SOMEONE IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT BECAUSE THEY MADE YOU MAD. DON'T YOU KNOW HOW LESS OF A MAN THAT MAKES YOU THAT YOU CAN NOT DEAL WITH YOUR PROBLEMS PROPERLY SO YOU NEED TO KNOCK OFF SOMEONE BECAUSE YOU ARE TOO MUCH OF A COWARD TO SETTLE THINGS WITH WORDS AND/OR FISTS? WHY? I AM OUTRAGED BY SO MANY THINGS IN THE BLACK COMMUNITY, INCLUDING BOB "I WILL BRING DOWN OBAMA BECAUSE HE AIN'T PAYING ME" JOHNSON:



THEN TRY TO JUSTIFY IT BY SAYING HE WAS TALKING ABOUT HIS COMMUNITY PROJECTS. "Bullsh!t BOB JIVING JOHNSON". COONERY AT LOW LEVELS AND HIGH LEVELS. THIS IS MADNESS, IT'S LUDICROUS. IT'S NOT THE WAY OF THE WORLD PEOPLE. WE HAVE GOT TO DO BETTER.

R.I.P.

National Security is Getting out of Hand

A five year old boy was prevented from getting on a plane because his name was the same as the name of a wanted man. Seattle:

http://cosmos.bcst.yahoo.com/up/player/popup/?rn=4226712&cl=5864401&src=news

And before you ask, no he's not black.

Now me personally after being subject to many "random" searches every time I have boarded an airplane makes me a little concerned about the focus of National Security when it comes to airlines. How in the world is this little boy of 5 possibly able to be wanted by the government for anything? He even had an identification card and clearly they could have ran his social security number without having to do a full search of everything they own. She was even instructed not to make any type of physical contact with her son until the ordeal was sorted out.

Another example of national security gone wrong is the death of Carol Gotbaum, angry and irate after missing her flight, she was found dead in the holding room having asphyxiated herself with the handcuffs they placed on her. Phoenix:

http://www.newsrightnow.org/articles/935/1/1081/Woman-detained-in-airport-dies-in-holding-room/Page1.html

Now, had this been a jail, items that may be used as weapons to harm self or another are taken. Is it normal for someone to be left alone in a holding cell handcuffed in an airport without any type of protection from themselves (if she was as disorderly as they claimed)? Security, in my opinion is there to ensure the safety of ALL passengers and passers-by in an airport.

When people are dying in the name of justice and children are being detained, you have got to stop and ask yourself what kind of nation are we living in? It seems as if this once inefficient Democracy is becoming something else, something more efficient, something darker. I would be surprised if Gestapo came out of the woodworks somewhere.

We really have to ask ourselves how much of our rights are we willing to give up in order to preserve order, to ensure safety, or to prevent discomfort. Are our rights, so eloquently designed by the forefathers of this country, becoming nothing more than illusions justified by the reality of terror?

And before any conservatives jump down my throat, I completely understand that people will always choose order and safety before disorder and uncertainties. I understand that the people at the airport were just doing their jobs and how the safety of all is more important that the comfort of one. However, in these cases, more than likely there were other people who walked on right on by, boarded one of those planes, and proceeding with whatever type of illegal activity such as: illegal slave trading, the distribution of narcotics, pedophilia and all the rest of the sex crimes, as well as everything else that goes down illegally - i.e. the Mile High Club...

But those are my thought, you can share yours if you want.

And I'm out.

'Tis All.

Why am I looking at this fool?!?!

You ever ask yourself that?

Whether is this mutha freaka that you used to get down with or a friend turned foe or even somebody who is just there for no reason. Do you ever stop and ask yourself this question?

Don't you always find yourself surrounded by the very people that you have absolutely no desire to see, speak to, or deal with whether you have a mutual friend, a class together, or whatever? I mean, let's be real - people are going to talk about me and you until the day we leave this world and probably after we go on to the next. And the fact that you didn't speak to me today is not going to change the fact that I'm keeping it moving.

So, I have to stop and think to myself sometimes, "why in the world am I looking at this fool?" We ain't cool, hell, you ain't even near human. So why in the hell are you smiling at me like a candid mo-fo? Negro you ain't sh!t. And if you amount to anything more than that, then kudos mo-fo: you got your 15 minutes from under the broke down piece of crap you call your home - oh wait, it ain't even your place. Sucks to be you, home-slice.

Case in point: I walk into a location that shall remain nameless and see the most raunchy piece of an unemployed waste of skin that had the nerve to address me by the name that my friends call me by. Boo boo, you are not my friend. Why the freak am I looking at you? Why are you here? What purpose do you serve in life? I know there is someone out there looking to get infected by the virus that is you. Find them. Needless to say I kept it moving - into my place of residence.

Example 2: If I am in the store getting service, looking around or whatever, I don't need to old @$$ riff-raff staring me up and down, undressing me with his eyes, and then say some stupid mess like " You too young for me girl - the only thing you can teach this old man is how to spend my money." Look around boo and stop playing yourself, you ain't got nothing that I want, including teeth. KEEP IT MOVING.

Now don't get me wrong people, I don't go around thinking that I am better than anybody else. However, I do hold myself to certain standards and I would expect and anticipate others to do the same. So if I offended you in some manner, these just my thoughts - I don't reflect the ideas of the masses.

You can rest assured this ain't hate on paper y'all - I don't DO hate.

But, I would like to know, am I rude for keeping it moving? Is it cool to be about my business, excluding the lames in the process? Is it messed up to keep these folks at a distance?

Let me know.

*

'Tis All.

*tshirthell.com

W(e)ave it up!

As a natural sistah, folks constantly ask me why I wear weaves more than I wear my afro loud and proud (4 yrs un-permed April '08, 3 yrs after total rehab from the creamy crack).



Now first and foremost I would like to insert a disclaimer - how I wear my hair is not any of your concern unless you're: 1. Buying it; 2. Styling it; or 3. Playing in it, which is definitely reserved, so there.

But to entertain such foolishness is the purpose of this whole ordeal so, my response:

First, if you knew how much effort it takes to make sure my hair doesn't get matted together like a wet sponge at night then you wouldn't be complaining when I snap an extension and throw some weave in that b!tch. The only option I have in the morning is water and when the weather is fluctuating like a mutha in the upstate, I ain't tryna walk outside with my hair wet.

Second, sweating on me cause I got a 'fro, it's like 50 million other chicks walking around got weave all up and through their heads but it's a "do" and not a betrayal to the livelihood. Stop Hating. Shoot, you can be like me and break away from the creamy crack too. Matter of fact, while you are at it, get some "coloration" in your hair that makes sense - not purple or blue. Thank you kindly. I ain't calling no names but er uhm:

*

I'm just saying.

Third - ceramic ionic tourmaline flat iron. Up to 410 degrees of straightening power, 30 sec temp time, no breakage and it cost my first born child. So I gots to make use of it - on my hair, my homegirls' heads and e'rybody else I may deem so necessary to get that good press. If it can straighten my hair, what in the world do you need a perm for?

Fourth, switch it up! I can go from 'fro to Hawaiian to Japanese to Afrikaan all in one week. Don't hate the game, just jump in it. Can you do that without sacrificing a car payment? You can't well, sucks for you.

Fifth and finally, my hair is just as beautiful as the next chick, with or without kinks. The fact that my hair in its natural state is so versatile and not like anyone else's is awesome, because it's mine and mine alone. My kinks won't be like yours at all. If I want to cut my hair so be it, you won't be able to tell unless I told you. Did I fail to mention how super cute it is with my fat cheeks?

So w(e)ave me up whatever and however. Just don't leave me bald or I'd have to cut yo' @$$, like Todd Sweeney.

'Tis All.

*blog.thegingersnapper.com/2007/06/02/schatar.aspx

Time

There are so many things that we take for granted and one of them is time. We always try to convince ourselves that there is either not enough time to do what we have planned so we wait until everything else is finished before starting the project or that there is too much time to be had and the same results still follow.

The problem is that many times it is not just our time that is at stake. It is your friends' time, your family's time, your teachers' time, or your lover(s)'. You sleeping late could cause a domino effect of everyone you encounter and everything you do. How many times have you awoken from a late night for an early morning, slept and extra thirty minutes only to realize that you didn't finish that assignment you put off or you slept through the first 15 minutes of lecture?

What about those you care about? How many times have we waited to call our parents because you are too preoccupied with the occurrences of our own lives - which most of the time is too small of an event on the grand scheme but expect our parents to jump at the drop of a hat when we are in a financial bind? Do you tell your friends how important they are to you just because you can? Even if you don't have many friends, tell them how much you appreciate them being in your lives. Not just because they helped you out last week, but because they are there and you can call them when you are in need and when you aren't - because they can put a smile on your face when hope is lost. Don't wait until it is too late to tell the ones that matter how much they matter.

And what about personal responsibility? It's not always traffic or a faulty alarm clock that prevents us from getting things done in a timely manner. In an age of technology, there are entirely too many resources - which leaves us with no excuse to maximize our time. Whether it's going to the gym, delving into a new book, or just plain ol' R&R, we don't have the time to not use the time we are allowed. We can't afford to pass out from the stress of overload or procrastination, so why even bother?

Why put off what we can do today for tomorrow? It certainly isn't promised. Stop bickering over what affiliation you are, what organization you're a part of, skin color, and the petty things and just show love today - you may not have another opportunity to do it.

So get up and go, get up and live, take that trip, do that exercise, love yourself. Don't become a recluse in your own mind or a room of familiarity. Stop constantly living in the past or looking towards the future because when you finally get there, you'll look around and realize that the present has passed you by: that you've missed out on friends, grandeur, splendor, hard times, good times, laughs, and tears. Then you'll live full of regret in your old age just now figuring out how you allowed such a precious gift to slip right through your fingers and realizing that you will never be able to get it back.

Speaking of which: Have you had your salvation today? Don't wait until it's too late!


'Tis All.